I didn't know.....

I didn't know
I'd look good with both straight hair and curls.
I'd learn to like wearing wearing glasses
Or that I would feel sexy in them

I didn't know
I'd learn to love those
"Ronald Mcdonald lips"
That the kids always made fun of me for

I didn't know
That the who made fun of me in high school
And made my life hell
Wouldn't matter fifteen years later

I didn't know
That I'd ever find a flattering bathing suit
Willing wear it in public
Without sucking everything in
And feel absolutely amazing in it

I didn't know
That I would make peace with my body
Not care if it's bikini ready
And wear shorts and crop tops
At the same time

I didn't know
That I could drive to the big city
In bumper to bumper traffic
And not be the least bit rattled

I didn't know
That you don't have to be in a relationship to have your soulmate
Sometimes they're the person that has been beside you through everything
And fully understand without you h…

Screw the perfect bikini body

Ah good old summer.  You're the season that we start(or should start) prepping for in January according to every magazine at the check out.  The headlines scream:"Your best bikini body.  EVER!"  "How to get the perfect beach body!"  "Get your booty bikini ready!"  And then in March and April the headlines start to bring us into panic mode: "6 weeks to your perfect bikini body!"  "4 weeks to your perfect bikini body!"  "Two week bikini detox!"
I'm sure I'm not the only one who falls for this crap.  As soon as the holidays are over, I swear that this is the year I'm going to have that killer bikini body.  I'm going to workout every day, and eat healthy.  And I do, but then I get busy.  Somedays lunch consists of Oreos and a Coke because there's no time for anything else in between cleaning up messes, somedays no amount of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse will entertain my toddler so that I can get 12 reps of any ex…

I'm breaking up with you

Hi and welcome to my blog!  I thought I would share something I wrote a few years ago when I was recovering from my eating disorder.  While this post is not exactly relevant to my life at the moment(I have been completely recovered from my eating disorder for over three years now), it serves as a reminder that I can handle the shit storm I'm currently in and will come out stronger and happier than before.

I’m Breaking Up With You
We broke up last night.  It had been a long time coming.  I knew from the moment I placed your shiny red body into my shopping cart at Wal-Mart that you were a bad idea.  You seduced me, telling me you would make me happy and motivate me to lose the last of the baby weight.  Had I known that I would fall under your spell, end up being controlled by you, and you would make not only my life, but the life of my family a living hell for the better part of a year, I might have left you on the shelf.  But alas I am a girl and we’re attracted to shiny things so yo…